Feelings

I have to be honest with you that I have less than a love relationship with feelings, simply because in my life I have had so many negative feelings.  Yet to deny, hide, or suppress feelings, as Dann Farrelly in "Brave Communication" says, is to be less alive.  This also takes a tremendous amount of effort and is one of the roots of an orphan heart.  Jack Frost often talked about living in "numb-numb-ville", the place where we deny or suppress what is really going on inside of us.  When we live as orphans we don't feel "safe" to express what is truly going on inside of us, which not only damages our connections with others but also puts us in a place of feeling cut off from the Lord.

Holy Spirit began to remind me of some of the things the disciples said, asked, or expressed in Jesus presence.  Things like "who gets to sit on your right and left in Your glory", disciples say to Jesus "don't you care that we are going to die", or Peter rebuking Jesus when He said He was going to the cross.  Amazingly the disciples seem very bold in expressing what they wanted, felt, or thought without much editing.  The religious pharisees of the day were always looking to say the exact right thing, in the right way, and to the right group of people to make them look godly.  Being in the Presence of perfect love gives us the freedom to express our deepest feelings, fears, and questions.

Dann Farrelly also says that if we are not able to identify what we feel and express it, then our feelings will rule over us.  Interesting, since as believers our call is not to live based on our feelings but by on the truth of Jesus that is revealed.  Our feelings are like a thermometer indicating what is going on in our soul and what we truly believe.  The challenge is to present our feelings and the beliefs that drive them to Jesus.

Many people have turned the Christian life into a "knowledge" about God (information) and rejected feelings all together.  This can often be elevated in intellectual circles of Christianity, like Seminaries or some churches.  Then there are others who go from Conference to Conference searching for the feeling of God's Presence or an experience of Him.  These are not bad but I believe God wants us to experience Him (involving our feelings), know Him (through experiences and encounters), and know more about Him (through study or teaching).  Could it be that God is bigger than the box we have put Him in and He wants to be more for us than we could ever imagine.

Blessings,
Bret